Hyborian Ventures
by Phea
Summary: Contest Entry I did recently for Zam. com. Didn't win so decided to post it here :p Technically this is a cross-over, but as Age of Conan is not on the list- here it is! Rate M Adventure/Fantasy. Concurrent story/sequel to Phe's Tale.


_Author's Note- Quick story I wrote up for a recent contest on . The challenge was to answer the question- "How did your character get to Hyboria?" Since the grand prize was a ~$3,000 gaming PC rig I gave it a shot. Didn't win, so decided to post it here as the beginning of a new story for Phe. _

_Unlike Phe's Tale, this story begins in present day Aht Urghan and moves into Age of Conan._

_Feel free to leave a review- good, bad or ugly! Also, give Phe's Tale a look if you haven't already :P_

Disclaimer: All rights reservered. Phe and all related characters/references to Vana'diel are owned by SE Inc, everything Conan is owned by Robert E Howard Properties and Funcom Gaming. This is my own original work.

Hyborian Ventures

A Phe's Tale Cross-Over

Chapter 1

The mid-morning sun was hot in Al Zahbi and Phe was thankful she'd had her moogle pull her bathing suit out of storage the night before- from the reaction of her boyfriend and their friends when she'd stepped out of the Residential Hall, they were too.

_Men!_ She thought affectionately, shaking her head at Havok as he mimed being shocked at the sight of her as he walked up to them. "Phe! Loving the gear!" He greeted her cheerfully, nodding to the rest of the group and ignoring Lod's glower, well used to the tall Elvaan's over protectiveness where the petite Mithra was concerned. "Blue is great on you, you should wear it more. Or less, definitely wouldn't mind seeing you in even less!"

"Havok- unless you want to be wearing my favorite color, why don't we get a move on?" Lod said, sighing as the Hume tried his brother's famous wounded rarib look on him. "Threats this early in the morning, Lod? What'd I do to you- and what is your favorite color anyway?"

"Blood, you idiot. He told you that last time you got too friendly with Phe." Havok barely managed to dodge as his brother's staff came down where his head was a bare instant before. "Now, I would like to get this done before we have to meet the others in Dragon's Aery if you don't mind. I really don't want them getting the idea I have Black Mage finished or the officers might add me to the dragon food list."

"Thank you, Lilb-" Lod gestured at the Taru waiting patiently next to them to transport them all to Jueno. "Meet you at Shamu then guys." With a bow for the Taru, he was gone. Being next closest, Lilbeast greeted his fellow Taru, who bowed in response and began to cast. "Can't believe his brother had to go on strike-" Havok grumbled only to be shushed by both his brother and Phe as Shihu-Danhu began to cast. "You might distract him!"

Phe didn't know if the mage had heard them and gotten startled or if Shihu had simly cast the spell on her by mistake, but all of a sudden she felt a familiar yanking sensation and was surrounded by absolute nothingness.

The inky nothingness hadn't even fully cleared when she noticed the smell. The reek had her instinctively jerking back her head and shaking it, eyes tightly shut protectively as she took shallow breaths through her mouth in an effort to avoid it. "Phew! His aim is even worse than normal if I'm in Pashhow-" Phe trailed off as she cracked her eyes open and immediately wished she'd kept them shut.

Squinting, she looked up at what had to be the brightest sky she'd ever seen- which was saying something considering all the time she'd spent in the ancient Ru'Ann Gardens where it often seemed like you could touch the heavens if you just stretched up and jumped a bit.

Lowering her eyes from the painfully brilliant sky, Phe dragged out her gobbie bag and rifled around in it for a minute before with a muttered, "Aha, found you!"- pulling out a pair of rose colored lenses with gold chasing around the frames. Putting them on with a sigh of relief, she finally took a look around. She was standing in the middle of a side street that was teeming with Humes. Unwashed Humes, she noted, nose wrinkling in distaste as an errant breeze brought the same gagging smell of decomposing trash and other unmentionable- and unthinkable- filth to her.

Not that she was by nature overly fastidious, as an Adventurer she'd often found herself hip deep in sewers or worse in her career but it was rare that she'd ever been in a dwelling of humans where the smell was so pervasive. _Even Bastok with all its foundries smells better than this!_ Breathing shallowly, she edged her way around a group of men- dressed in what seemed to be some sort of uniform made up of leather breastplates and kilts.

As she worked her way around the loud group, Phe caught snatches of their conversation and nearly stumbled when she realized that she couldn't understand a word of it. Although each of the nations had their own language, the common trade tongue was universally spoken throughout Vana'diel and she'd yet to visit any place where she couldn't understand _anything._

Not wanting to be caught staring- she didn't want to chance passing out from one of the locals' breathes if spoken too directly- she was nearly clear of the group when what had to be the biggest damn Hume she'd ever seen gave a shouted laugh at something said to him and tipped back his head to drink something from a wineskin, catching sight of her as he did so.

_"Faw, jiih! Ghyios fyq y lau ufipa!"_ At that unintelligible statement, all his companions turned to look at her and Phe found herself face to face with the group of men. One of them, slightly shorter than the one who'd caught sight of her, eyed her up and down and started towards her with a laugh, addressing her this time in that incomprehensible language. _"Lau, huh? Uajj, E'k qopa woip kyqrap uiq'r kelb oq rpweld wui ior."_

Recognizing the look in his eyes if not what he was gabbling on about, Phe took a step back shaking her head, lifting her hands to signal that she didn't understand. Either he didn't get the message, or wasn't going to be deterred by it and he lunged forward to seize her arm before she could take another step back. She was yanked forward, and Phe found herself staring into angry blue-grey eyes. He snarled something at her in his harsh language, but this time she was too busy gagging from the smell of garlic and poorly cooked meat to pay attention.

Garlic Man's friends apparently found her reaction hilarious because they roared in laughter, pointing at him while slapping each other on the shoulders. Red faced, Garlic Man let her go, turning to say something angrily at one of them. Stumbling a bit before getting her balance, Phe took a deep breath and reached into her bag for what Lod had once teasingly referred to as her implements of minor destruction and mass irritation.

Pushing the confusion of how she'd ended up in some side alley being accosted by drunken boys and _that smell_ from her mind, she focused on Garlic Man and without even a thought about whether or not it should even be possible- she began to cast. As a Red Mage, Phe couldn't call down massive storms of lightning from the heavens to smite anyone, but she wasn't really trying for that anyway. Until she figured out where the hell she was and how to get back, she didn't really want to call attention to herself by frying the entire neighborhood.

Garlic Man had just turned back to face her with a leer on his face as she released the spell, rapidly followed by another and yet another until the entire group was frozen in place unable to move or speak.

Shocked, Garlic Man stared at her, mouth working silently as she smiled sweetly at him. "Nice to meet you," Phe said pleasantly, bowing slightly to the group. "See you again!" She had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing as she quickly applied both the white magic Sneak and Invisible before she grew too tired of the concentration required to chain-cast spells like she had been.

Not that she had been tapping into the elements that heavily for the bindings and silencing spells, but it was never easy to chainspell for an extended length of time and she didn't exactly have any back up in this foreign place. Hurrying out of the alley way, she dove headlong into the teeming crowds, not caring what direction she was headed in as long as it was _away_.

_Mom's soloing rule- if you can bind it you can solo it. If "it" equals more than one- you can at least out run it._

Until she could work out exactly where or even when she was, as far as Phe was concerned, keeping her head down and staying as inconspicuous as possible seemed like a very good idea. And her bright blue swimsuit was anything but inconspicuous. So too, she noticed, looking around was the complete lack of variety in the crowd.

As far as she could see there were Humes of all sizes and age- but no Elvaan, Galka or even Taru, much less Mithra wandering about. Even the smallest town had a goblin or two peddling wares- and a city as large as this one seemed to be should have at least a couple. Clearly, a wardrobe change was in order.

Mentally thanking Altana for the sight-blinding spell of Invisible, Phe quickly changed into what she privately referred to as her "working clothes"- with luck, the heavily embroidered black cloak would hide her ears. There wasn't much she could do about her tail- all her clothes were tailored to so it could be free and her capes were all half-length so they didn't get in the way when she was out in the field.

Shrugging, she decided to worry about that later if she had too and quickly pulled up the blood red enameled cuisses that had been Lod's Starlight Fest gift to her that year and her boots. Strapping on her sword belt, she finished just as the invisibility spell started to wear.

Making a calculated decision, she just re-buffered the invisibility spell. _The noise from the crowd should hide any sound I make but best to keep Invisible up for now._ She'd just finished casting when a huge roar went up from the crowd. Startled, she looked around wildly, until catching sight of a mass of bodies across the crowded square.

A huge wall that reminded her of the entrance to Imperial Whitegate stood on the far side of the square. A large cumbersome looking set of closed iron bound plank doors where set in the center of the wall. The walls, Phe noted where designed much like the ones at Aht Urghan, where someone could look over the side of them and address those on the other side.

Another roar went up from the crowd's throats as she jogged closer. Gaining the rear edge of the crowd, she took out her frustration and irritation at finding herself in this strange stink-pit by ruthlessly elbowing her way to a good vantage point. It did her bruised sensibilities good to see her victims look around angrily for the culprit behind their own bruised ribs- she hadn't been exactly gentle. She gleefully stepping down hard on a hairy sandal shod foot as she dodged around a huge figure and caught sight of the perfect place to see what was happening.

Ignoring a loud fight that had broken out behind her between a man who was roughly the size of a goobue and what looked to be his wife- it was hard to tell however, Phe hadn't ever seen any woman that heavily covered in facial hair before- Phe climbed on top of a stack of crates half again her height and settled down on the topmost one.

She focused on the figures on top of the wall, two rather plainly garbed men flanked a center figure, who was quite finely dressed from what she could see, but in darker colors. Mentally tagging to two men on the left and right as priests or maybe advisers, Phe studied the center figure.

Tall, very tall for a Hume, he had to stand at least even with most young Elvaan she judged- at least six and a half feet. Broadly shouldered and powerfully chested he didn't seem to need any sort of amplifying spells or equipment to speak to the crowd as he held out his hands and waited for the tumult to die down.

"_Maimja ic Tartantia! Ribyw eq y byw oc zajyxpyreil! Ribyw ua kyph rfa qrypt ic rfa lau wayp ylb kyha iccapeld ri Mitra ri xjaqq oq!"_ The dark robed man boomed out, to the adulation of the crowd who quickly started to chant and sing riotously.

_**"Fyej Conan! Fyej Conan!"**_ Roared out of a thousand throats, making Phe hiss and draw back her ears in protest at the battering her ear drums were taking.

Perched as she was above the crowd, she had an unparalleled vantage point and what she saw chilled her to the bone. The lack of other races, a different language, strangely dressed Humes had all been worrying, but what made her fur stand on end was absolutely shocking to the cosmopolitan Red Mage.

She'd caught sight of what had to be a religious sigil on of the priests was holding and it was that sight that made her blood run cold and hammered down the fact that wherever she was, it was very very far from home.

Vana'diel, since time immortal, been home to many gods, but above all had stood Altana, the Winged Goddess who had given birth to the races of man and her consort the Twilight God, Promethia. None of the gods, not even the feared Odin who ruled the underworld or the horrid Uggalepih that the wretched Tonberries revered had as their symbol a cross with a rising sun on the top bar.

"Where the hell am I?!" Phe whispered to herself, the sound of her voice lost under the roar of the crowd.


End file.
